It seems that sometimes food bloggers can get a bad rap. Some people are quick to draw a line between real writer and blogger. And many people joke at the enormous number of folks who now own a web address and talk about the delicious nature of food. Which is pretty on point. Because really, who doesn’t own a food blog these days?
But over the past two years of being a part of this community, I have witnessed something extraordinary.
Whenever a disaster strikes, no matter where or to whom, this group of strangers, all connected by their love of making and sharing recipes, gathers together. They rally. They support. They fundraise. They bake sale. They give back, no questions asked and no thank yous necessary. And whether or not these people are real writers or even cooks, they are truly all generous.
Perhaps it is the nature of the subject.
Food is about gathering one’s community. And when you share food with others, you are telling them you care. And when you eat what you have been given, you are sending that love right back.
Food is about connecting. Food is comfort.
The first time I ever lost a loved one was when I had just turned thirteen and my grandmother passed suddenly of a heart attack. There are three parts of those first days of mourning that I remember most. I was at my friend’s bat mitzvah when my parents came to tell me the news. I saw my father cry for the first time. And a friend brought over fried chicken.
The chicken came in a picnic basket with a note. This was a special recipe, one that only appeared when someone was experiencing loss.
Without having to say anything, this fried chicken expressed all the condolences, hopeful thoughts, and juicy words of wisdom that anyone could impart. And that first night, we sat silently as a family, chewing through that basket. Left alone to simmer in our thoughts, yet constantly hugged by the warmth and care of others with every bite.
That’s how I get to this pie.
A few days ago a loved member of this food blog community suddenly lost her beloved. Out of no where. No explanation.
One day they were walking hand-in-hand. And the next, she was letting his go.
Tweets, facebook posts, comments, and other 14o words of support have been flooding the internet. Some people are close (both in proximity and in friendship) to Jennifer. And others, like myself, have had mere exchanges online. But everyone has once again come to the rescue, pouring out affection and a desire to help in anyway they can. Heartbreaking and uplifting all in one breath.
In a moment of inspiring strength and clarity, Jennifer left the community a note on her blog.
For weeks, she says, she was planning to make her husband his favorite peanut butter pie. And every day she would promise herself that this day, she would finally sit down and make it…
And today, her one request is for everyone to make that peanut butter pie. To hug those you love. And to share it with those you hold dear.
So this is my pie. For you all, for Jennifer, and for Mikey.
This is my pie that helped me slow down and enjoy the traffic. To revel in the fact that I had a to-do list and that even if I didn’t cross off all the items, I enjoyed the ones I accomplished. A pie that I made with my mother. And a pie that I ate with friends I don’t see often enough, many of whom have also experienced untimely loss.
This is my pie that reminded me to live in the moment. To always tell people that you love them. To never go to bed mad. To not sweat the small stuff. And to replace stress with chocolate and whipped cream.
This is my pie that celebrates life. The flakey crust, the bittersweet chocolate, and the rich filling.
And this is just one pie out of the hundreds, maybe even thousands, that celebrates Jennifer and Mike.
So today, I implore everyone to be a food blogger, a real writer, a cook, and rescuer. To join this community at our big, ever welcoming virtual table. To cheers to Mikey and to appreciate eachother, one bite of pie at a time.
adapted from Jeniffer Perillo’s Peanut Butter Pie
….if you do make a pie, and you’re on Twitter, the hashtag is #apieformikey. If you tag your post with that, Jennie will able to find them all someday
Salt-Free, Nutty Chocolate Pie for Jennie and Mikey
- 1 1/4 cup ground matzo crackers or matzo meal (about 5 large crackers)
- 1/2 cup brown sugar
- 4 tablespoons cold butter, cubed
- 5 tablespoons ice cold water
- 4 ounces chopped chocolate or semi-sweet chocolate chips
- 1 cup heavy cream
- 8 oz plan Greek (FAGE) yogurt
- 1 cup tahini butter
- 1 cup confectioner’s sugar
- 2 to 3 tablespoons coconut milk
- 1 teaspoon vanilla extract
- 1 teaspoon freshly squeezed lemon juice